Archive for the 'Art' Category



23
Jul
09

30 good minutes

Tomorrow I will be interviewed about my faith journey for a PBS series called 30 Good Minutes.¬† When I was first approached for this, I was at the apex of my intention to devote all of my spiritual gifts¬† in the area of the visual arts to the church I was attending. Since that time…seems like ages ago…I have lost that church and am somewhat of an itinerant artist type, having already made a clean break with the secular art world. Never burn bridges, right? I didn’t do the burning. My partner and I were the ones calling the fire department. The church was not interested in receiving the fire department because it didn’t think there was any need. Now it’s a different story. Many wandering, homeless church folk looking for resolution. I am not alone, but really, except for my partner and a few supportive and loving friends, I am alone. I stand before God asking directions when I should be quietly, faithfully waiting. Transition time.

I am wandering and wondering what God will do with all of this mess. Tomorrow I will be interviewed and I no longer am clear as to what sort of artist I am or why. What shall I say? Am I still committed to providing visual art as a doorway to worship? I’ve lost the church and the people. I don’t know where, or if, green shoots will sprout. I have a new church community, but I don’t know if I will regain the passion I once had for this work. I think the muse is asleep…sleeping beauty waiting for the prince…of peace…to come…and plant that kiss of passion and delight.

15
Jul
09

whew!

LionI have been asked to present my work at the Mennonite Arts Weekend in Cincinnati Ohio next February 5-7, 2010. Most sane people will say I have loads of time to prepare and so would I if I were sane. But sanity illudes me much of the time. I am what kind people call, a highly strung individual. Hmm, how high is highly, I wonder? Isn’t there a song about how low can you go? Maybe there’s one about how high can you fly. Me? I fly high…up above the sky, as often as I can (which isn’t all that often, but I can dream). Lately…for the past many, many dreary months I have been tethered to some unfortunate hooha at the church I was attending that filled my heart with angst and debilitating sorrow. I could do no personal work at all and each month that past, I worried that I would have nothing meaningful to say to the MAW attendees grew larger and larger. Yes, that is performance anxiety.

Right now I am flying because today, I managed to plow through the tangles and write a draft of 2/3 of the presentation. Hooray! I feel great about that. I have prevailed. Now I can start selecting the art I want to present and coast for a while. I can even engage in other projects I am asked to do…or that I want to do just for me, without having this performance thing lingering in the back of my mind like a bad conscience.

And what is the topic of my presentation? Well, you are getting to know me a bit by now…it’s Suffering! Okay, not suffering for it’s own sake. Suffering as common ground and sacred space. Something I know a bit about, especially lately. But that’s another story.




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