Archive for November 4th, 2009


New bird on the wire.

Have you ever noticed how birds flock to power lines and sit close together like little teapots waiting to be poured? I don’t know the ornithological reason why they do this, but as a human, I find it a delightful spectacle…a performance of sorts, just for me. I have imagined many reasons and usually fall back on the visual fact of so many birds content to share their space. No one is squawking about too much or too little, too loud, or too quiet. No, they are all sharing the wire and evidently getting something good from doing so. I am limited and do not understand. I am bound to personify the spectacle…all these birds are getting along—they are birds of a feather flocking together—members of the same club. No one is excluded. I see this and  wish we humans could enjoy that harmony.

God’s children were meant to have harmony, but do not know how to get there without letting go of ego interests. “How can I be myself if I let go of myself?” This is a question most anyone could easily ask.  It ‘s a topic for another blog. This time I just want to talk about the wire and the birds.

When a new bird comes to sit, the others don’t scare it away. If there’s room, the new bird finds a spot and joins the plump row of sitting birds. I love that—love to see it and wish I could have that same experience. At this point in time, I am a new bird on a new wire, but either the other birds are invisible to me, I am invisible to them, or I have cataracts and am not seeing beyond the pain that sent me to this wire in the first place. I am a new bird on a new church wire, not out of intention, but because the former church wire snapped in two and all flew flapping and squawking and circling about. Some of those birds thought I was too heavy for the wire. There is truth to that, but the greater reason for the wire breaking is something beyond:  some of them didn’t see the wind whipping up behind them because they had fluffed up way too much.

Took me a while to get to know those birds, to love and live with them on the wire. Now I have to start all over again and it seems harder than the last time. I don’t knowBird on wire why these new birds don’t see how hard it is to be a newbie. They are all good birds, but for some reason they don’t show themselves, don’t let their feathers touch mine. I am the new bird on the wire and I wish it weren’t so lonely. Last year this time, I was sitting happily on the old wire. My sister was dying and I was able to touch her feathers in a special way, because mine were touched. I am a bird on a wire, waiting for the silence to stop…waiting for the memory of loss to fade.

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November 2009
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